LADIES

I prefer those girls who shave
As opposed to those who epilate,
And those who aren’t pushy
Or inclined to dominate;
Those who smoke filter-less
Compared to light cigarettes,
And are wont to inhale
And unlikely to spit.
Them that drink pints
Instead of kids’ halves,
And take it up the arse
Without having being asked;
Those who move with you,
As opposed to wet fish,
And flood twice a day,
And grant any wish.
The ones horizontal,
The few standing up,
Bent double or trebled
Or single or grouped,
And who feel like a boulder,
And sound like a scream,
And look somewhat older,
And say where they’ve been,
And taste like the ocean,
And smell like sunshine,
And are dirtier than earth
And glow when they’re mined.